astrology – My Sterling Summer

crystals and cards…

So I guess I have made some progress! In the past 10 or so months I’ve gone from my first moon water to having a window sill full of crystals and stones, a drawer full of candles, and even purchased my very first deck of oracle cards. Queen of the Moon Oracle to be exact. It is a beautiful set. I was inspired by a woman I follow over on TikTok. She is new to the practice as well.

The road traveled this year has been somewhat rocky. Stress, anxiety, a garden that I didn’t put my full effort into and still struggling with the whole “I don’t fit in” type of thinking…you know. Those kinds of things. But I know I am moving forward. One step at a time. There are so many things that I want to learn! I have a very bad habit – no, that’s not the right word – character trait? I don’t know. Whatever it is, it makes me get frustrated that I can’t just learn and absorb all of this information instantaneously. LOL Probably ADHD if I’m being honest.

Astrology, crystals, kitchen witchery, candle magick, oracle/tarot, goddesses and gods, – these are all of the things that I want to learn more about. My practice will most certainly be eclectic. And over time, I may be drawn in one direction more than another. The trick here is not to keep overwhelming myself. Because there is so much information out there, it is easy to do. I know I’m repeating myself from other posts, but it’s like another reminder to focus on one subject at a time.

Right now, I want to look at the three oracle cards that I pulled yesterday. Or should I say, the three cards that basically jumped out at me. And if you’re reading this and you use oracle and/or tarot cards and wonder why I’m looking at cards pulled yesterday, well, maybe my card pulling schedule is going to be different. I may use the cards weekly for now. Everyone’s life schedule is different. That’s all!

First up is Balance. This card is actually quite appropriate at this moment. It says that “Extremes of anything are rarely helpful or useful.” Expecting myself to learn it all fast is the extreme. Certainly not helpful or useful. I need to balance the various areas of my practice as I am learning more about them and becoming more comfortable and knowledgeable. We will probably never have ‘perfect’ balance in our lives. But it is important to recognize where the imbalance is (and I’m starting here) and use self-reflection as a tool to help get ourselves/myself more centered and feel less overwhelmed.

The next card is Pleasure. Essentially this card is telling me that I need to stop taking things so seriously, like being stressed out about learning everything at once, and focus on what makes me happy. The booklet that goes with the deck says what we all know. Life these days has gotten us to feel like we have to be ‘doing’ all the time. Like if we aren’t always keeping busy with something, we’re being lazy. No! We need to take breaks in life so that we can experience pleasure. Whether that is a quiet evening on the couch with a glass of wine, candles, and a good book or an afternoon at the museum or heck – you may want or need a good roll in the hay with someone and enjoy each other! LOL

Lastly, I got the card of Self-Reflection. (Funny how the Balance card mentioned this topic) “Be curious about your own nature. Choose to turn inwards to quietly contemplate who and what you are and want.” Talk about a perfect message! One of the things I tried to start during this year is shadow work. But there were so many things buzzing around my brain that it was just another thing that got thrown into the mix and forgotten. This pairs well with the Balance card for sure.

So for me, it will be important to try to set a sort of schedule. With the things going on in my life, it’s not always easy trying to fit something in every day. And some days may just not work at all. We all get exhausted sometimes and that is a hint that you/I may need to just take a day of rest…a mental health break of sorts.

Treat yourself.

Just be yourself

Have I mentioned how overwhelming the internet can be? I’m pretty sure I have. Dang. While one can glean much valuable information from the ‘net, you can just as easily get confused and discouraged. Taking a break is a good thing now and then.

One of the things that I had been mulling over in my brain was the “witch aesthetic.” What I mean by that is that the vast majority of posts/pictures that I see when browsing all have this dark academia, foresty, everything is brown and black kinda vibe. “Am I doing it wrong?” I was worried. I mean I know I have been told to just do what feels right to you. And my friend (who has her own practice) her home was not all dark either…except the front parlor room. LOL But a girl starts to doubt herself when so many others seem to be doing it “the right way” – – Until today!

Scrolling through witchy posts, I came across one where her home was brightly decorated and I loved it! It was exactly what I needed to see. I’m not the only one! Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against the darker decor, in fact, I really like it, but it’s just not how I want to decorate at home. You should have seen my daughter’s bedroom. Wow…talk about dark. But it looked so good!

Originally, I had thought that the kitchen of my dreams would have beautiful ocean-y blues but I found a picture of a kitchen that I fell in love with. The colors were muted, not dark, but not bright white either. The farmhouse style sink was black and there was butcher block countertops, floating shelves, a gorgeous gas stove…it was nearly perfect. Who knows when we’ll be able to redo our kitchen, but we can dream. Or maybe sell this house one day and buy one that already has an amazing kitchen. I need a good kitchen.

That brings me to another thing I see online all the time. Labels. Everyone has a label. In fact, in a FB group I belong to, someone asked a question about the type of witch they are/may be, and someone answered with a HUGE list of types of witches. I was a little taken aback with that list. Which one am I? I already feel like I am more of a house/kitchen witch. But even the description of that doesn’t fit 100%. Seems like labels are more of a hindrance than a help. What do you think?

When I read about the “House Witch” it made me think of my paternal grandmother. Her home was the center of our family. Holiday gatherings and any other gathering you can think of was at her home. And she always had a feast set out for the group. I grew up with a very strong desire for my home to be the same one day. I dreamed about my immediate and extended family visiting and having that same magical feeling I had as a child. Unfortunately, It isn’t but my desire to feed an army has never left me. Cooking for my former church really helped scratch that itch, so-to-speak. It was wonderful! I just wish I could do the same again.

Let’s all be sure to remind ourselves that just because we see others practicing a certain way, that does not mean we have to do what they are doing. We do not have to fit into a certain mold when it comes to the way we may or not practice. I mean…I like brighter colors, I enjoy being in the kitchen cooking, creating recipes, sharing with others, the moon, the stars, candles, journaling and making moon water. What kind of witch is that? Who knows? Who cares?

Just be yourself.

Moon, Stars, and Candles

Disclaimer of sorts: This was written about a week ago and I never posted it. I was going to delete it, but I won’t. I want to be real with myself. If I’m stressed or confused, or just unsure, I need to just embrace it…So there we go.

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The last couple of weeks have me rather overloaded. My search for information overloaded my Facebook page with so many other pages that are somewhat related and the suggested pages just won’t stop. On those pages are ideas, suggestions, and information provided by dozens of people with varying interests and opinions. Too much! When I get overloaded like that, I just want to throw it all away. Give up.

But no. That is not what I need to do. I am on a lifelong journey to figure out where I belong. What path I am “supposed to” take. Turns out, that has been the problem all along. I can recollect moments in time through my life where I tried to fit in…to belong. Instead of trying to be part of a clique, I need to just be me. We all need to just be ourselves and stop trying to do things “the right way.” You know?

So here’s the thing. I like horoscopes. I think it is very interesting how the timing of our birth can determine many characteristics that we have. I enjoy looking at the sky. The constellations are intriguing as are the planets in our solar system. I mean, the entire solar system is fascinating! I’m on third round of moon water. Tarot cards are making a little more sense to me. But I don’t fully understand things like spells. Truth be told, that kinda freaks me out. The only ritual that I have embraced at the moment is journaling in the morning by candlelight, and at various times of the day or night.

Putting a label on myself doesn’t feel right. Witch? Wiccan? Pagan? Can I just be a moon, stars, and candle girlie? You know…I really like working in the kitchen. I love prepping food for the week. I love cooking. It is peaceful to me. Does that make me a kitchen witch? Instead of fitting into the boxes that others create, maybe I’ll just work outside that box and find what works spiritually for me.

There is a book that I just recently purchased. It is called “Sacred Seasons: Nature-Inspired Rituals, Wisdom, and Self-Care for Every Day of the Year by Kirsty Gallagher. I am really enjoying the book so far. The author describes things like the wheel of the year and there are journal prompts with each chapter, which in turn discuss each season. I’m sure I’ll post more about that as I get into the heart of the book. The fact that there are prompts for writing is something I know I will really enjoy. Writing more is definitely something I want to get back to.

This journey will never end. There will always be something to learn. And I am learning how to be me again. Whether it is enjoying the outdoors again, along with our garden, or letting my words flow across the pages of a journal, or learning about traditions that our ancestors in the old country or our indigenous ancestors practiced, I am going to soak it all in and do it my way.

Right now, I am enjoying the moon, the stars, and my candles.

The Snow Moon

I wish I was sitting in a space like in the photo above. Being out under the moonlight would be wonderful, except that it is 17 degrees outside right now. There is no place for me to do any ritual. But I am here…with you while you are reading this.

This is all so new to me. Still somewhat overwhelming as I fight the thoughts that hold me back. Remembering that there is no right or wrong way to embrace my own personal spirituality is the struggle sometimes. So I am here…doing what I enjoy…writing.

I have read that during this time of the Snow Moon, I should write down my intentions. What do I want to manifest? What do I want to release? What do I want to bring into my life? These are difficult questions to answer for me as I have lived the past 35 years taking care of others and meeting their needs while setting my own wants and needs aside. I can barely even tell my kids what I would like as a birthday or Christmas gift. What do I want? I want them to be happy. But I deserve to be happy too, right?

While reading today, or listening to an audiobook, or was it a TikTok video? Yeah…it was a TikTok video, the creator spoke of removing the barriers that I have that prevent me from experiencing childlike joy. What a statement. How long has it been since I experienced true joy? Like just live and experience something without worry and just take it all in…enjoy it to the fullest. It has been a very long time my friends.

But this is a start. I began writing in a diary when I was about 14 years old. I would write almost daily. Thoughts, hopes, fears, poems, whatever came to mind. I remember when that practice stopped. I gave up myself for someone else. I can see the moment that my life trajectory changed. Kinda mind blowing. Yet here I am. Putting my intentions out into the universe.

With a Snow Moon playlist going in the background and the power of the moon around us, and the Creator by my side, I intend to get back to the things I love. Journaling, serving, being an encouraging human being. And my desire is to be more in tune with nature. As the Imbolc season began, so did the seedlings for what is to become my garden this spring. I look forward to taking care of it so that it can nourish and take care of me. My friend called it Brigid’s Bounty, for the goddess Brigid.

Releasing negativity and things that no longer serve me are also things that are done during the full moon. Let me tell you, the past several years have been full of trials and tribulations, stress and chaos, anxiety and fear. My attitude certainly did change. My intention is to look at things more positively again. Not that every situation is a positive one…I know. But I don’t want to be so fearful. I want to release the burden of fear. I want to release this anxiety. Not every situation, not every day, is going to be perfect. My intension is to look at things in a more positive manner, or at least try.

I want to bring in good habits that help me take better care of myself and release the bad habit of neglecting myself and my health. I want to find my spiritual path. Any real sort of spirituality has been missing in my life for almost 10 years now. May this new journey that started with the new moon earlier this month, introduced me to Imbolc, and has now landed me here during the full Snow Moon, help me move forward…teach me new lessons…help me heal… and so much more.

Blessed be.