Disclaimer of sorts: This was written about a week ago and I never posted it. I was going to delete it, but I won’t. I want to be real with myself. If I’m stressed or confused, or just unsure, I need to just embrace it…So there we go.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The last couple of weeks have me rather overloaded. My search for information overloaded my Facebook page with so many other pages that are somewhat related and the suggested pages just won’t stop. On those pages are ideas, suggestions, and information provided by dozens of people with varying interests and opinions. Too much! When I get overloaded like that, I just want to throw it all away. Give up.
But no. That is not what I need to do. I am on a lifelong journey to figure out where I belong. What path I am “supposed to” take. Turns out, that has been the problem all along. I can recollect moments in time through my life where I tried to fit in…to belong. Instead of trying to be part of a clique, I need to just be me. We all need to just be ourselves and stop trying to do things “the right way.” You know?
So here’s the thing. I like horoscopes. I think it is very interesting how the timing of our birth can determine many characteristics that we have. I enjoy looking at the sky. The constellations are intriguing as are the planets in our solar system. I mean, the entire solar system is fascinating! I’m on third round of moon water. Tarot cards are making a little more sense to me. But I don’t fully understand things like spells. Truth be told, that kinda freaks me out. The only ritual that I have embraced at the moment is journaling in the morning by candlelight, and at various times of the day or night.
Putting a label on myself doesn’t feel right. Witch? Wiccan? Pagan? Can I just be a moon, stars, and candle girlie? You know…I really like working in the kitchen. I love prepping food for the week. I love cooking. It is peaceful to me. Does that make me a kitchen witch? Instead of fitting into the boxes that others create, maybe I’ll just work outside that box and find what works spiritually for me.
There is a book that I just recently purchased. It is called “Sacred Seasons: Nature-Inspired Rituals, Wisdom, and Self-Care for Every Day of the Year by Kirsty Gallagher. I am really enjoying the book so far. The author describes things like the wheel of the year and there are journal prompts with each chapter, which in turn discuss each season. I’m sure I’ll post more about that as I get into the heart of the book. The fact that there are prompts for writing is something I know I will really enjoy. Writing more is definitely something I want to get back to.
This journey will never end. There will always be something to learn. And I am learning how to be me again. Whether it is enjoying the outdoors again, along with our garden, or letting my words flow across the pages of a journal, or learning about traditions that our ancestors in the old country or our indigenous ancestors practiced, I am going to soak it all in and do it my way.
Right now, I am enjoying the moon, the stars, and my candles.
My Sterling Summer 